WHAT'S IN A LUNGI, DUDE ?

Before you catch me off guard and ask me, why you named your blog this way?, I thought of some viable getaway and here are few.

Let me tell you why a Lungi/Kailli/Mundu are best attire for a man, when compared to any other of its competitors like Trousers, Denims, Shorts or even pajamas. Fist and the foremost, it will let the air in, if you know what I mean!! This will keep you relaxed throughout the day, in nights it lets you go way out of your control. Lungi is very easy to tie, hold both ends, let one end wrap around your waist and let the other end wrap over it, that’s it. Try even giving a Lungi to a Native American without the instruction manual, without doubt he would have wrapped the lungi around his waist the way it is supposed to be wrapped.

Now that it’s easy to tie, its equally easy to untie, imagine you are alone in your apartment with your girlfriend or wife around, you do not want to waste your time coming out of your cocoon, lungi makes it all easy and evident. Every other attire has a zip which helps you deliver during a nature call, haven’t you experienced the horror behind every zip in your childhood? or sometimes even after that, especially men, either you Jam it with your ding ding, or the zip may stop working, or sometimes you may even forget to zip it back. You are close enough carrying your embarrassment with you, unlike any trousers with zips, the lungis are all out and open. Lungi is the only attire where men could catch up with women wardrobe colors, lungis come with all possible flowers and checked embroidery, they sometimes even match your wife’s printed Saree, lungis come with various eye catchy colors as well, compared to that of any monotonous trouser design which are always the boring same.

Lungis are cheap, indeed they are. You get five lungis at a cost of one trouser, that too with varied and vivid designs. It helps you spend less unlike trousers, if you are wearing a lungi there are no compulsion that you need to wear neither a shirt to top it up, nor a matching shoe. It’s a common man’s attire, even superman used it behind his shoulders, next time you see a superman cartoon watch out the red lungi attached to his neck which hangs behind his shoulders. Lungies are convertible, this is the only attire where men can show off their legs or cover it up instantly, they could grab the bottom end of the lungi and wrap it over the thighs, and make it look like a shorts without a divider, or a mens short skirt.

You could even tear off and throw away your lungi to show your protest. It’s kind of a famous ritual down south in Kerala, when one is not happy with things going around him, he unties and throws away his lungi from his waist to showcases his protest. Some group of people in neighboring state Tamil Nadu use a stripped shorts worn beneath a lungi, just in case if they lose control over a lungi regardless if they are protesting or not, they also use it to store their valuables as lungis is free from pockets. The Punjabis use it as a dance costume when they perform their traditional Bhangra.   

You don’t have to worry about pocket pickers, unless and until if somebody is really attracted to your lungi itself, so try keeping it as simple as possible. You could embroider your loved ones name in a lungi or even your name in it, so that you could claim yours when you are in a huge gathering or even after a wash. In olden days, at pain end of a war or even before a war, a lungi was used to pass the message of peace, there were no colored lungis then, it was all white, hence lungi even helped in saving wars and lives. If you are physically hurt by a cut or a bruise you could tear one end of lungi and use it as a plaster over it before you call a doctor, we should add this useful tip if anyone exporting lungi to foreign countries, mid-eighties Indian cinemas had shown a visual method of doing this emergency act and also the aftereffects of this, especially if you are healing a women’s wound.  

Lungi can be used double sided, both sides of the lungi can be swapped, since there are no inner and outer side to a lungi. Lungi can be used as a napkin, if you wash your face and searching for towel, which you will never find, then never mind, the lungi is there to help you. Trust the lungi, it will save your face, when you sneeze, when you cough, clean your hands, cleaning the mirror of your bike, cleaning the CD if the video is stuck, removing dust from your mobile screen, removing a hot vessel from a gas stove, lungi will save you and you could do all this while you are wearing one.

In a hypothetical scenario, imagine you are in a joy ride in Indian airlines and by design you are crash landing, everyone has a parachute (not referring to coconut oil) except you, a lungi might save you, get hold of four ends of the lungi and the middle part at loose, see what happens, you will easily glide through and save your own life, just that you should know how to land and carry a lungi in your travel bag. Continuing the hypotheticals, its recession and you lose your job, and your family abandons you, like you did it to them before, then a lungi could help you beg, float it between your hands and see how much it can collect for you.

Remember one of the stories in the “One Thousand and One Nights” where Prince Husain used flying carpet to travel around the world, regarless you remember it or not it was not a carpet, if you dig deep down its actually a magical Lungi, most westerns did not understand lungi then, hence it was renamed carpet during translation from Arabic to English, I know you will not believe me here, remember you believed a "flying carpet" story though.

Mahatma Gandhi weaved "The lungi" first from tailor made spinning machine, then he made an extension to the lungi to cover up his chest, does anyone know the name of the attire he wore? It’s an extended lung my dear friend. A lungi can shape itself up based on its user, a 40 inch waist or a 28 inch waist both could can use the same lungi, both gets wrapped up regardless of their waist size, not together though. This is the USP of lungi, the adaptability and flexibility unlike the trousers. Some men use lungi to wrap up the things which they buy from grocery store or from a liquor shop, they could parcel a pet bottle to a full bottle in their lungi. They even use lungi as an umbrella and now don’t ask me how, use your imagination here.

The only bridge that connects trousers and lungi are the belts, there are few who are always in fear of stripping (Dishabiliophobia) when they are in their lungi, and the mighty belt would help them handy. However now that we know the use of belts, then why stitch a trouser which may strip anytime or use a belt even when we are rest assured that the trousers  wouldn’t go down.  

Lungi is symbol of leadership and power, every Indian politician uses a lungi. Though some may differ, a majority of them are in their lungi, you know how important is majority in politics, don’t you? Lungis gave birth to modern day designer checked shirt, next time when you go to a mall, look for a designer checked shirt in casual wear section, and you would observe the duplication, the stolen designs and why don’t we have our native lungis in any of the malls. For people who still don’t believe me or in Lungis, God loves black and he loves lungi, yes, people who follow lord Ayyapa’s wardrobe choices would know what I am talking about, can’t get myself more serious than this, ignore at your own risk.

Lungi is symbol of freedom, self-expression, a sparkle of creativity and everlasting love which wraps you within. Keep calm and wear a lungi, Just tie it [tick mark here]

Did you know?

The standard adult lungi is 115 cm in height and 200 cm in length, when open.

Children's lungis are also available in approximately 2/3 of this size.